Life is weird right now, y'all.
Related: Life will always be weird.
A lot of crazy things are happening; and what's worse, I can't really talk about them en masse. It's personal stuff compounded with adulthood mashed up with some really hard decisions I need to make.
Shoot. I wish I hadn't picked up blogging as a hobby, because I can't share much more than that on the internet.
But what I can share with you is the Bible verse I came across on Easter. I wasn't able to make it to church (long story short, I placed a larger value on sleep than on being surrounded by a few hundred other people hearing a lesson I've heard a hundred times before and already know. I kinda hate going to church on big holidays, but we can talk about that another time).
As I was saying, I wasn't able to make it to church, but I did spend a considerable portion of the morning reading my Bible and journaling, and a large portion of the evening in community with my cousin and best friend Raquel, both of whom love Jesus.
In the morning when I woke up, I remembered a painting my friend Ben made for me a few years ago. It's pretty abstract, but has 2 Timothy 1:9 on it:
For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love and self-discipline.
I'm not sure why it came to mind. I haven't seen that painting in months (sorry Ben. It's somewhere in my room, I promise...I just don't know where I packed it.) and I haven't thought of that verse in a while, but it is so so perfect for my life right now.
We weren't created to be scared. We weren't made to be timid, or fearful. Incapacity, hate and indulgence are not the trademarks of our spirits. We're intended to have a heart that is powerful, that is loving, and that is self-disciplined.
In the midst of the growing pains I'm experiencing, with overwhelming options and intimidating situations, I'm working toward a powerful, loving, disciplined spirit.
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